Day 47: Fatty Fat Fatty

So, until about 7 o'clock, I had a blog in mind already. It was witty, it was snarky, and it was even a little inappropriate. I kept thinking how great the blog would be, and I was going to write as soon as I was done with dinner, and a little tv. Little did I know that this decision would fully derail me from all sanity and logic. All with one little harmless show "Shedding for the Wedding". I thought to myself "awesome! A show about normal people losing weight for the wedding just like we are! This will be great to see how they do it and steal some tricks from them so i can look just as fabulous!" I was already wrong. Now, how bad can it be you ask? Well let me tell you.... The show starts much like every other reality show nowadays- we were introduced to the couples. I immediately found a few that I would be rooting for. One corrected her soon to be husband when he said "me and so and so...." I laughed because I often find myself doing that same thing, so of course I loved them. Not to mention that they are GATORS so what's not to love!? Anywho.... they met their trainers, and did their initial beach session workout. This was already starting to look a BIT like another weight loss show that I won't mention....... Then, they moved into their mansion fully stocked with only the leanest meats, fruits and vegtables, and healthy snacks and were given a nutritionist to teach them how to cook. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaait a minute. This isn't real life at all! No one really lives like this! When I need food, I have to go to the grocery store and walk past all the chips, candy, snack cakes, and other deliciousness just to get to the "healthy" section waaaaaay in the back of the store. It's total crap that these people no longer have to live like that. They have the food brought to them, and there is no way for them to just hop in a car and head to Mickey D's on their way to work- a) because they don't have cars and 2) shedding for the wedding is now their JOB. How are they really marketing these people as "everyday"?! Not ONCE has that been my day.



Anyway, I digress.... so after preparing meals, they head to the gym with their trainers. There are Bob and Jillian... wait that's not right.... i don't remember who the trainers are, but they are there. Kicking ass. Of course there is the biggest girl gagging every 30 seconds which got old fast and I was already praying that they would be the couple to go home this week so I wouldn't have to hear that wretched, wrenching sound every again. (They didn't) ANYWAY. So the weekly weigh in. First they tell us what the combined weight of the couple was initially. The first couple steps up. 460 initial combined weight. DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN I think. That's HUGE. John looks at me. He figures out OUR initial combined weight and I almost gag. We are HOW fat!? Sigh... the weigh in continues. One couple down, 21lbs, 30 lbs, 36lbs etc. In. One. Week. Ummmm what!? Their WEEKLY weight loss is as much as our combined weight loss in SIX weeks. I panic. I throw down my fork immediately, log all the calories I just consumed, and promptly got off the couch to get ready for the gym. Thank you Shedding for the Wedding for making me feel like a complete fatty fat fatty in under 60 seconds.

Great. Now, do I KNOW that this is not logical? Yup. Do I understand that all these people do all day is work out and eat prepared meals? Sure do. Did I panic anyway and realize that I have been half assing this week, consumed WAY more calories than I should have, and need to get to the gym NOW. You bet your ass. So I did. I am also UP 2.5lbs which is not helping my mental stability this week. Thank you so much nature for doing your part to ensure that I will feel like a complete and utter failure for the rest of this week, and all of next. Not that I have really been helping the cause anyway..... Sigh......

47 days down...133 to go!