week 5 in all it's "gory"

So here we are... week 5 weigh in. The mid-point of the Biggest Loser games. I thought I would be down AT LEAST 10lbs by now, but thanks to 2 weeks of increase, and baaaaaaaaasically eating whatever I wanted on date day on Saturday, I'm not.

The week itself was a continued struggle as always, but if I thought I was ready for anything, I was sadly mistaken. Enter "the trainer". John had 2 personal training sessions included with his new gym membership. It was recommend that he should meet with "the best". The "guy who is poised to take over soon" etc. It showed. He had him doing things that he probably hadn't done since high school. He came home exhausted, but excited. I couldn't wait for my turn. Ok, so I COULD wait. I was terrified that he was going to leave me as a whimpering puddle of pain in the middle of the gym floor. Finally, Friday arrived. I was told to eat extra calories to prepare myself for the awesome hell that was before me. The trainer said we would start with "a few" questions, and then he would show me some examples of what the sessions would look like if I chose to purchase training (for the low, low price of $1600 mind you................). I painfully answered what my weight was but was very proud to announce that I "already lost 9 pounds!" I realize in hindsight that my words probably sounded very similar to Ralph Wiggam's "I'm a unitard!" and I felt like my 4th graders telling a random fact in the middle of reading group. He looked at me pathetically. He tested me body fat, and his eyes widened. Yes. Widened. He then proceeded to tell me that A) I am obese. B) my body fat is 20% higher than "ideal" for my height  C) I need to lose 35lbs MORE beyond the (whopping) 9 that I have already done. and finally, D) That "normally" it should take about 30 weeks to do that, but in "my case" it will probably take about 50.....Well nothing makes a girl want to run out into traffic faster. He decided that it might be better instead of actually working out, that he should determine my fitness level instead. He also (oh so delicately.....) informed me that EVERYTHING I am currently doing is wrong. That the kickboxing class that I was SO proud of completing is "way beyond me". That the machines that the gym is FULL OF "do nothing". That the reason I always gain my weight back is because I focus too much on cardio, and of course, not the correct kind, or amount of it. EVERYTHING. From that point on, he treated me like I was a 99 year old woman. Pitying looks. Sad little "you can do its" and "oh don't worry about its" throughout the rest of the session. I'm pretty sure he even gave John a sideways "I'm so sorry that you have to deal with THIS every day of your life man" look. But that could be my imagination. Although I don't think so.

The moral of the story is, I went home and cried. And sulked. And ate. I'm pretty sure we can cross him off the list for motivational speaker of the year.....