The Great Meltdown of 2012....

Well, it's happened... I made it 6 days into the new year before I FREAKED OUT. I did the absolute worst thing a person who doesn't feel well, who is PMSing, who is tired, who is already VERY aware that clothes are not fitting can do.... I weighed myself. <dun, dun, dunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn> I found that not only have I gained every. last. everloving. pound. back, but I am actually above where I was a year ago at this time. Awesome. I took a deep breath and dealt with that, and continued getting ready for the day- the "baggy" sweater that is notsomuch baggy..... the unjean jeans which have been getting increasingly tighter since I bought them (weird....) and boots. Boots. Innocent boots. Until I put them on. I couldn't zip them up. WHAT!? Who can't zip up BOOTS!??!!? Me. That's who.
Well, thats it. The freaking boots pushed me over the edge. The tears started flowing. The hyperventilation began. The hysterics insued. Please keep in mind that this was at 7:30 in the morning and I was trying to leave to get to work! It is NOT cute when your husband has to zip up your boots for you, while you stand in all kinds of awkward positions trying to make your calves look skinny. There isn't a magic "suck it in" for your legs.........The worst part was after all that, I realized that I had nothing to take for lunch other than a yogurt and a 100 calorie pack, and I had NOTHING in the house for breakfast, so I ended up at McDonald's anyway! What I sight I must have been with my fat rolls, tight pants, boots partly zipped up, and tears streaming down my face.............a hot mess.
As soon as I got to school, I emailed the staff telling them that I am starting Biggest Loser... then I proceeded to give daggers at the backs of all my skinny coworkers as they walked down the hallway. Bitches. Skinny bitches. (ok that was harsh I know..... they aren't bitches at all. Just skinny. So I hate them today.) Sadly, the only person to respond to my invitation so far is a very sweet pregant girl who said that while this is a great idea, she won't be able to participate this year. Ha. We'll see what kind of response I get.... so far, I am going to be the Bigger Loser even if I gain 10lbs......