A. LOT. Truthfully, I could end today's post right there and you would still get the gist of my day. Before I go all Debbie Downer on myself, let me say that I woke up early this morning, put on my big girl panties, and went to the gym on my own. I did 45 minutes of cardio, lifted arm weights, and sat in the sauna when I was done. All on my own. That's where my good day ends. If you don't know me, or if you DO know me and have missed the memo, I stress out. A lot. About everything. To the point that I have been told that maybe that's the reason why I'm not losing weight like I think I should be! Anyway, my good day rapidly took a plunge and landed in a big pile of turd. To cheer myself up, I quickly returned back to my old friend-food. I mean, as far as vices go, food is at least the least damaging of all the possibilities... unless you are trying to fit into a wedding dress in 5 months (5 months!). Before lunch I had only eaten about 75 calories from breakfast, then burned 475 at the gym. By the time I got to lunch, I was ready to consume my body weight in fried food. And I did. Two out of three cheeseburger sliders (sorry John.... I ate a cheeseburger....) and fries. I ate most of my day's allotment of calories in that one little (and I do mean little) meal. And it was freaking delicious. And I have felt nothing but guilt for the rest of the day. What does that mean!? Am I actually starting to care about what I look like? Am I really starting to get that "gym high" that I swore I never would reach? So many feelings! So many unanswered questions....
20 days down... 160 to go! (where is the time going!?)
PS~ I apologize for my lack of humor lately! It's been a rough few days thanks to the scale who shall remain nameless.... I promise to be back to my normal jovial self soon! Keep reading!
And here I was hoping for another song title as your entry title...
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